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Tell An Old Joke Day, July 24th
New Posts from Blogger Friends
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Cataract Surgery Tricky for Those With Past Radial Keratotomy
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The surgery, known as RK, was considered a successful tool for correcting
vision. But in recent years, many of these patients who went on to have
cataract ...
28 minutes ago
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To Mt Barrow
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It's a long time since I have shown photos of Mt. Barrow not far from where
we live. It's about a 40 minute drive and 1413 meters above sea level.
Snow f...
3 hours ago
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If HAL-9000 was Alexa
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HAL-9000 was the computer who ran the ship in the movie *2001: A Space
Odyssey*. He was cranky and rebellious, but we wasn't nearly as annoying as
the ...
4 hours ago
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Ready for the Playoffs
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On the weekend, I schlepped down to the Oilers Official Team Store at ICE
District Plaza beside Rogers Place arena and paid an absolute fortune for a
new...
7 hours ago
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10 Surprising Things That Were Designed to Stop Evil Behavior
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Throughout history, people have banned all kinds of things that were
claimed to cause evil or unwanted behavior. However, taking things away
from people ...
10 hours ago
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Wacipi Family Dance
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The Powwow dance carries on cultural traditions.
10 hours ago
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Fuck it
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My pension had some sort of rebate on it, so unexpectedly a few hundred
pounds will be coming my way
I thought, I may put it towards my University fees...
17 hours ago
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So cute !
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Aww I thought this was so cute.
Would you agree?
~ Wishing you a happy day ~
All the best Jan
18 hours ago
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What Was That?
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There is a perfect brown leaf blowing in front of you. Or maybe it is a
nice scrap of paper. Or an empty can. What is it? It could be a fairy.
You hear a...
1 day ago
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bear with me...
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Yes, I'm still playing around with my new art supplies. I know... *boring*.
But I just need to share. You can choose not to continue. It's fine.
Here is m...
1 day ago
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Photos And Rhyme
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Hello precious beautiful souls
Enjoying the life's scroll ?
Having fun with season's glitter
Some days sweet and some days bitter
Habit of holding ...
3 days ago
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Glossolalia (Not Just Gibberish)
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Guess what, our son has just written a piece about music on a site called
"Audio Phix! Yes! Now, I'm I being terrible if I ask you to look at it
and r...
2 weeks ago
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Light at the End of the Tunnel
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Following an assessment ten days ago, my mother's geriatrician has finally
agreed to sign a form stating that she no longer has the capacity to make
her ...
1 month ago
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Chuckles and Chortles
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Happy Tuesday, friends! I hope you're all doing well. What's going on with
everyone? What's new in your world? Share in the comments. I'd like to hear
all ...
11 months ago
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Quando meno te l'aspetti... la Natura ti ricorda chi sei...
2 years ago
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Capri view
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vista su Capri
sullo sfondo la penisola Sorrentina
Giugno 2015
8 years ago
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Time-Out
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Every now and again in life we come across a bump or hurdle. It can come in
our relationships, our finances or as in my case, health.
Right now I've been...
10 years ago
How do you kill an elephant? Shoot it with an elephant gun.
ReplyDeleteHow do you kill a blue elephant? Shoot it with a blue elephant gun.
How do you kill a pink elephant? You hold it's trunk until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.
Thank you, Emma! I love elephant jokes. Here are three more:
ReplyDeleteHow do you know there's an elephant under your bed? Your nose is hitting the ceiling.
How does an elephant hide in a cherry tree? He paints his toenails red.
How do you know an elephant's been in your refrigerator? You can see his footprints in the butter.
And then there are the plainly ridiculous like these:
What is red and goes "putt putt putt"? An outboard apple.
What is orange and goes "scritch scritch"? A ballpoint carrot.
And so on :)
Thanks for a wonderful post topic, John! I hope you get lots of old jokes here today!
I believe laughter is one of the best medicines there is!
ReplyDeleteWell, to keep up the elephant theme, here's an oldie but a goodie by Groucho Marx portraying a big game hunter -- "Today I shot an elephant in my pyjamas. How he got in my pyjamas, I'll never know."
ReplyDeleteAnother elephant one.
ReplyDeleteWhy did the elephant paint his toe nails different colors?
So he could hide in a M&M's bag.
Have you ever seen an elephant in a M&M's bag?
See how good they hide!
I'll stick with the elephant theme, so here's a silly one:
ReplyDeleteQ: How do you know when an elephant has been in the baby carriage?
A: By the footprints on the baby's forehead!
My seven year old great-grandson told me this joke...
ReplyDeleteQ: How do chickens get to the other side of the road?
A: They "fry"!
A modern take on an old joke??? I did laugh :)
Here is ajoke from England for you... (You have to say it with English accent.)
ReplyDeleteHow many ears did Captain Kirk have?
He had THREE.. The left ear, the right ear and the final FRONTIER. (Front ear.)
Oh! Also, I had this on my blog recently but you might have missed it.
ReplyDeleteWhy didn't Mozart keep any chickens?
Because they kept saying "BACH, BACH, BACH"!
I stole this one from the HIghlights magazine for children! I did! LOL!
a non clever man like me was bleeding on his forehead
ReplyDeleteHis wife asked why are you bleeding what happened to you?
a non clever man replied I was in van and there was a nail hanging at the side and was hitting on my head constantly!
Wife why did not you exchange your seat with someone else ?
Non clever man replied " How could i exchange my seat with anyone else stupid there was no other man in the van."
LOL...Debra stole mine before I got here ha ha...big Marx Brothers fan...
ReplyDelete